Pervasive Drive for Autonomy (PDA) and School
Written By Amanda Watson (LMHC)
For families navigating Pervasive Drive for Autonomy (or the less preferred term “pathological demand avoidance”), the start of a new school year can bring with it unique challenges that are hard to understand for those unfamiliar with PDA. Whether you are just starting out on your PDA journey or have been on it for a while, this article aims to help you feel a little less alone and to provide pathways to support, understanding, and resources to take with you.
What is PDA?
Pervasive Drive for Autonomy is not currently diagnosable as a standalone diagnosis, instead being recognized as a distinctive profile of autism, with some recent studies noting a link to ADHD and some other neuro-developmental conditions as well. Just like with autism, each person’s experience and presentation of PDA is unique to them.
At the core of PDA is an extreme anxiety response to and avoidance of everyday demands. Demands are everywhere: they can be external (coming from the outside world) or internal (coming from the individual), and the stress they cause is cumulative. Demands can be based on expectations, direct demands from others, casual demands, or even hygiene related. Common recommended strategies and interventions are rarely successful and can make matters worse.
PDA and School
What makes Pathological Demand Avoidance tricky when it comes to school is that many PDA students internalize their experience, and while they seem completely fine from the outside, they can experience overwhelming anxiety within. Often, these students will end up having meltdowns or shutdowns at home, where it finally feels safe to let out everything they have been bottling up all day. Or there are the students who will exhibit “problem behaviors” at school, called “leveling” or “equalizing” behaviors, in an attempt to establish autonomy and feelings of safety in an environment that is full of consistent demands and expectations. Even well-meaning staff members and teachers can unintentionally invalidate their PDA students, and make it that much harder for PDA students to learn.
Parenting On Expert Mode
Being a parent of a of someone with Pervasive Drive for Autonomy is like playing a game in expert mode. The recommendations made by professionals unfamiliar with PDA run the risk of backfiring, often leaving parents and their kids feeling defeated, isolated, ineffective, and unsure of where to turn.
Resources
As challenging as the Pervasive Drive for Autonomy experience can be, you’re not alone. Our team at Sequoia Teen Counseling Center is prepared to help both teens and their caregivers navigate finding and seeking appropriate supports and accommodations to meet the individual needs of youth and their families. We’ve also compiled a list of resources on the next page that we hope you’ll find helpful!
PDA & School Resources
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Support & Resources for PDA. Created for Families, Professionals and PDA Individuals. The site includes free handouts and printables with information on PDA, webinars, training, support groups, and more.
Paid Trainings:
Advocating for Your Child in the IEP/504 Process
Description: This conversation discusses the steps to request services, as well as identifying common accommodations, supports, or goals for school plans for children who fit the PDA profile.
Back to School...or Not! Creating PDA-Affirming Learning Environments
This course is for you if your PDA child dreads school, refuses to engage, or shuts down when faced with pressure. It covers:
How to recognize autonomy-driven nervous system responses (and stop mistaking them for behavioral issues)
Practical advocacy strategies for public school IEPs and beyond
Alternative educational options—microschools, private schools, and residential programs that get PDA
Homeschooling and unschooling approaches that honor your child's learning style
How to create environments where your PDA child feels safe enough to actually learn
PDA North America Peer Support Groups
PDA North America helps facilitate many PDA Peer-led Support groups throughout North America. Support Groups are always free to join, and volunteer-led.
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At Peace Parents is a neurodiversity affirming business training parents, grandparents, therapists, teachers and others to understand and support PDA children and teens around the world.
Podcast Episode: PDA Parents - Episode 8 - PDA and School
This episode covers Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) in the context of school, the type of accommodations that are necessary for a PDA child to succeed, and what their children’s school journeys have been like for them and for the whole family.
Blog: Back to school anxiety for PDA parents: you are not alone
Shares the life experience of the writer of navigating school with a PDAer, with resources for advocating and supporting a PDA child or teen in a school environment. Includes Strategies and Support for School (Letter Template)
Free Workshop: To School or Not to School? PDA, School and Unschooling
This live class has the goal of helping parents make informed and empowered decisions around schooling, learning, and education for their PDA child.
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In this video presented by PDA Society, 14 year old James kindly shares information about his experience of PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) and masking.
Description: An insightful journey into the world of teen PDAers as we hear from them directly about their lived experience.
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As a parent of PDAers I have used these printable/shareable informational handouts as a quick way to introduce staff and teachers to PDA during IEP meetings, including what relates to my child and what doesn’t. I have had success in presenting it as an invitation to have a conversation about PDA. It can be helpful to share what parts relate to your child’s experience, and communicate the hope that it will help them not just with your child, but with other current and future students as well.
