Resource Corner: Parenting Tip
Harness the power of validation!
Helping your teen feel seen, heard, and understood is invaluable to their mental health and your relationship. Even amidst a conflict, try to validate the valid.
Here are some simple examples of ways to validate in the situation of not allowing your teen to go to their friend's house, because they are behind on assignments. Notice how you can validate their experience while still making your expectations clear!
Examples:
"You feel (emotion)?"
"You feel left out?" (it's okay if they correct you. It still shows that you're trying to understand!)
"Anyone would be (emotion) if (situation)"
"Anyone would be disappointed if they had to miss out on going to a friend's house
"It makes sense that you feel (emotion) when (situation)"
"It makes sense that you feel mad when you're not allowed to do what you want to do"
Briefly restate the valid points of what your teen says
"You really want to go to your friend's house because a lot of people will be there, and this assignment is an overwhelming amount of work".
